People Who Should Suffer Beheading; or At Least An Unhealable Paper Cut 3

People who use any of the "Maybe If You Didn't..." (raise your voice, have such an arrogant tone, dismiss or challenge my point so quickly because it's just my opinion, etc.) counterpoints when engaging in discussion.

These types of people, which pretty much encompass the entirety of my society, drive me utterly crazy, but more permanently, dictate and maintain my present life of solitude. I hear one of these counterpoints at least once during any discussion I engage in with friends, family, or co-workers simply because (employing the afore mentioned examples) my voice raises a decibel higher when stating my views, my tone is perceived as arrogant, or I dismiss or challenge their solely-opinionated views with logic and relevant, easily understood examples. I also get accused of bullish persistence, wanting to "win" a discussion (because most people also refer to discussions as "arguments," as if there is a chance one particular view can score more points than the other), or trying too hard to change someone's views (once again, as if this was possible--other people don't change someone's views, the individual person changes their own views after exposure to contrary facts and re-evaluation.)

I guess I operate under the presumption the people I'm having discussions with know me...you know, really know the real me (or at least the closest version of the real me presented to each of them individually), because I usually don't waste my time speaking to people I don't care about in some fashion or other...but if they really knew me, they'd know I don't believe in wrong or right (so how could I ever claim to "win" a discussion?); I simply present my most recent views (usually researched and evaluated, but if they aren't and still in the early stages of formation, I preface my statements as such) on any given subject. And when I refuse to utter the phrase "I understand your views" (or anything else resembling validation), I'm labeled as close-minded. Once again, if these people knew me, they'd know I'm so open-minded, I'd listen to someone trying to persuade me Shakespeare's Hamlet was actually an alien from another planet if this person presented sounds views with textual evidence as support.

Another saddening fact about the discussions I join (because I'm gun-shy at originating them because of their adverse effects), I don't partake in said discussions to flounce the gears of my mental process and the products they manufacture...I join discussions because I want to be educated...I want to re-evaluate my prescribed notions...not to "change anybody's mind," but to possibly unearth a morsel of logic capable of changing my mind.

The only comforting and useful result from hearing a "Maybe If You Didn't..." counterpoint during a discussion is the self-effacing notion the people I'm speaking with can no longer combat my views with logical statements or evidentiary examples and must resort to personal attacks to assuage their own self-esteem. 

So presumably, I do win discussions when they end with one of these counterpoints...but why does it always feel like I lose?

To "fit in" or socialize inside my social circles, I guess I have to practice my small talk, remain updated on entertainment gossip and sport scores, overuse comments about the weather, form critiques on the latest superhero film, watch all reality shows or the news for current local events (actually, I don't really mind talking about these subjects, but they don't easily lend themselves to enriching conversation); however, when will I ever find time to read a book? Digest the author's view of the world, allowing it to newly influence or validate my previously held views? When will I have time to think?

Or if I do read a book, think about this book, and form views about this book's message, or simply form an educated, well-supported viewpoint on any subject through life experiences, I'll have to hoard my newfound thoughts to myself...because I guess nowadays, reading is just as uncool as thinking.